I Should Be Packing, But…

My husband and I did a thing. A big thing. We decided to move around the corner into a different house. Not on a whim exactly, yet it was definitely a bit more on the side of spur of the moment. At least for me who is a planner down to my last red blood cell. 

As if 2020 was not crazy enough, now we are moving our family of six down the block. This means so much packing must be done during a pandemic. Stress levels for me are at red alert. There are way too many junk drawers to be emptied and kitchen cabinets to be cleared. Not to mention school is in session (at least for this week) and extra-curricular activities have a million new safety rules on top of meeting times. 

Yet, right now I am writing. I should be packing, but the words want out so badly that I could not even hear my audio book as I tried to covertly stash old stuffed animals and loose toys into the box for the Salvation Army. I am not exactly procrastinating the packing process, but I will admit to being easily distracted away from the task. What I just wrote gives me pause, because I do not like thinking of writing as a distraction. I want it to be a main focus in my life. 

Writing lately for me has taken a backseat. I am still doing freelance work, but I find myself squeezing in the time to write rather than dedicating my normal work hours to it. The move and packing is partly to blame. COVID-19 and politics are the real culprits. Blog posts and published articles are having a difficult time breaking through the noise on social media. Print outlets are also facing hard economical times just like so many other businesses. The chaos around the world makes everything harder and me personally more jaded.

Having a creative outlet during uncertain times has always been a safe haven for me. Yet, somehow through this pandemic I forgot that. Writing makes me feel better. Or at least allows me the chance to get gripes off of my chest and on to a laptop where my lines of logic can be better evaluated. Be it emails, texts, blog posts, newspaper articles, or magazine profiles, I almost always feel an ease from putting words out there for others to read. 

Lately, I have been thinking a lot about my piece from a few years ago titled Wanting Something More. It was basically a break-up letter to an insurance career that had been so good to me for over a decade. It was also a hello to a focus on my world as a writer. Right now, even with a pandemic and a house move squeezing away the valuable minutes I have to write, I don’t want to quit. I love what Tessa and I have done with Family Footnote. I love the magazines and newspapers that allow me to contribute. Most of all I love being able to tell people that I am a writer, in addition to being a mom.

I know I should be packing, especially because this home is filled with 9+ years of memories, random Tupperware lids, and an embarrassingly high number of Pokémon cards. However, right now as my youngest child naps, I want to take some time to get these ramblings on paper.

This piece is coming considerably close to being what I would describe as a “So What? Post”. Yet, if it has any saving grace it is that anyone reading this will know it is okay to step back from the mayhem of COVID-19, masks, potential close contacts, youth sports drama, virtual learning, and school board meetings. Take a breather and remember what is important.

It is okay to be a little wrecked over the state of affairs in our nation. It is okay to feel overwhelmed by school mandates and the what ifs of the upcoming flu season. It is NOT okay to ignore a part of yourself that helps you stay connected and happier. 

I could go on and on about first worlds problems and real world problems, but instead I will stop right here and just acknowledge that it feels good to be writing and engaging and trying during difficult and chaotic times. But now I have to go, because really I should be packing.