Tessa’s Anti-Bucket List–Do You Agree?

Kelly wrote a wonderful anti-bucket list, and I found myself agreeing with most of the things she listed. It’s hard for me to say “I never want to….” because I change my mind so often. (Sorry, hubby.) However, as I get older, I can confidently say I don’t have a desire at this moment (nor do I think I ever will) to complete the following things. It’s kind of comforting knowing that I don’t have to add more to a list of things to do. Please tell me someone agrees.

Marathons Aren’t For Me

I never want to run a marathon. Ever. Six or so years ago, I wanted to challenge myself physically. I decided to train for a ½ marathon. As runners, we had to sign up in January, and I still think I blame the decision on the dark days of winter.  

I did train for and run a 13.1-mile race, and I’m glad I did. The training was time-consuming for a mom of young ones, but my hubs supports my goals and we made it work. Slow and steady was my motto, and I had some great thinking time on my training runs. 

As I crossed the finish line of that 2-hour race, I looked around me and didn’t like what I saw. Sure, there were some people smiling and some had finished an entire marathon in the time of my half, but their bodies were struggling. Pukers in one corner, leg cramps in another. Even though I enjoyed the challenge, the training, and the race day, I’m pretty sure I can blame my bum hip on all of the preparation.

When we were finished with the race, I wanted to go and eat my weight in whatever was available. Other runners did the same. I remember getting up after my meal and trying to walk to the bathroom. My legs had decided they had done enough, and I almost fell down. As other runners got up from their tables, I noticed the same thing happened to them. It was then that I thought, “I’m good. No more ½ marathons for this woman.” 

I was proud I had fulfilled my goal, but I only ever plan to stick to six miles or less. And I don’t need to do them in a race form. I’m saying “no” for my hip, and I can confidently say I never, ever want to run more than six miles again. No marathon for this lady. I’ll stick to enjoying my workouts!

I’m Not Made For Body Piercings

I really love body art on other people. The tattoos my friends have are like little signs of artistry and memories that wrap like vines around their bodies. I like the idea of a tattoo. I’m just waiting to finally decide on my favorite design before I make the leap. As previously mentioned, I change my mind quite a bit, so I’ve got to wait and be completely sure. I’ve been working on this for 40 years, and I’m almost ready. But piercings? I can’t.

First, my job doesn‘t allow me to be creative in that way. Second, I would look ridiculous. I only sort of look like I can pull off a double ear piercing. And only on the weekends. I am not opposed to getting more on my ears, but any other pierced areas don’t appeal to me.

I’d ruin the nose piercing after the first sign of a runny nose from spring allergies. I have enough problems waxing my eyebrows to add another obstacle there. Collar bones freak me out already, and I’d get most of my clothing caught on all of those cute rhinestones. My genetics and my three children have taken away a belly button option, so I’ll have to bypass the piercing thing. My time has come and gone. I’ll just have to admire my friends’ art and leave it at that.

No Golf League In My Future

Look, just like Hootie and the Blowfish in the nineties, I know I’m going to get some flack for this one. I was the only human being 10 years or older who didn’t like Hootie, and it was a very unpopular decision. Same with golf, but guess what? I still don’t like it. (I do, however, like Darius Rucker as a country artist…but that’s another blog). 

I do not have the temperament for golf. I grew up playing basketball, soccer, and tennis. All of those sports allow a person to really work through aggression. I know super bubbly short women seem like they don’t need an outlet for that kind of thing, but we absolutely do. Golf only CREATES more rage and frustration. I feel Happy Gilmore on a very personal level. That ball will not go into that hole. Standing and watching other people’s balls NOT go into a hole is also not on my bucket list.

My friends love golf. My husband and kids dream about golf when they’re not golfing. When we drive by a course and my husband isn’t on it, he says, “Man I wish I could be golfing today.” and I think, “Those poor people are trapped in an endless quest to never get what they want from that sport.”

I don’t ever want to go real golfing again, and I sleep just fine at night knowing that. 

What about you? Do you have unpopular things listed on your anti-bucket list? What are they? We’d love to know.